For You

You who is having a pretty shitty time of it right now. Todays song is for you. Mwah

SOTD: Closing Time - Semisonic

Closing time
Open all the doors and let you out into the world
Closing time
Turn all of the lights on over every boy and every girl
Closing time
One last call for alcohol so finish your whiskey or beer
Closing time
You don't have to go home but you can't stay here

I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home

Closing time
Time for you to go out to the places you will be from
Closing time
This room won't be open till your brothers or your sisters come
So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits
I hope you have found a friend
Closing time
Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end

I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home
I know who I want to take me home
Take me home

Ramble Ramble

I am blessed, beyond what i deserve, with beautiful people in my life.

Last night, the conversation i was dreading happened completely spontaneously. And it was not what i expected. Somehow you knew. You saw straight through everything and knew. You said things that made sense out of something that always seemed false and pathetic to me. You made it sound like something i could believe in. You have been in the same places i have. You know. I hope the conversation continues.

Last night i felt loved and comforted. Standing back and looking at those people who are closest to me, i felt so divinely blessed. Like God decided that even though my life will throw curve balls, even though i'll be on the roof, about to step off so often, i'll have the most understanding, supportive, loving people, right there to pull me back and just help me be ok.

Last night you did something that i didn't expect. it was something small, but it meant so much. You of everyone know where i've been and you're still here, just quietly doing small things, but things that keep me going. You are my music and my life would be so quiet without you.

Song of the day

Oops. forgot this:

Tenacious D - The Metal

You can't kill the metal
The metal will live on
Punk-Rock tried to kill the metal
But they failed, as they were smite to the ground
New-wave tried to kill the metal
But they failed, as they were stricken down to the ground
Grunge tried to kill the metal Ha,hahahahaha
They failed, as they were thrown to the ground
Aargh! yeah! [x2]

No-one can destroy the metal
The metal will strike you down with a vicious blow
We are the vanquished foes of the metal
We tried to win for why we do not know

New-wave tried to destroy the metal, but the metal had its way
Grunge then tried to dethrone the metal, but metal was in the way
Punk-rock tried to destroy the metal, but metal was much too strong
Techno tried to defile the metal, but techno was proven wrong
Yea!

Metal!
It comes from hell!

Leave Metal Alone

So some stupid kid takes a sword to a school kid wearing a mask and now music is to blame. metal in particular. The kid listened to slipknot and this drove him to murder. BIG fucking surprise. If i listened to Slipsnot, I'd also want to kill. Have you heard them? What a load of shite.

But really. Blaming his music? What about the fact that his folks knew he was getting bullied and did fuck all about it? Bad parenting, unsympathetic kids, a school system that lets the oddballs slip through the cracks. Could this be to blame? Hell no. It must be metal's fault. Dis die Duiwel se musiek.

Well, Cliff from Agro sums the whole silly situation perfectly in this story on News24:

Heavy Metal's Good Too - Artist

Johannesburg - Parents need to be educated on the good influences of heavy metal music and how to deal with teenagers listening to the odd "bad" songs, an artist said on Thursday.

Cliff Crabb, vocalist of the South African heavy metal band Agro, said most metal music sympathises with teenagers who are outsiders and teaches children to think for themselves about social issues.

"It is outsider music for the outsider," said Crabb, adding that most metal bands teach children that even though life may seem unfair, they need to "be strong and fight the good fight".

"Parents have this fear of music which they themselves don't understand."

He acknowledged that there are some heavy metal bands that do not have positive influences.

"There are bad apples on the scene. There are bands playing on shock tactics to sell records, purposely trying to mess with kids' minds and upset parents."

Slipknot's music could be dangerous

Is Slipknot, the US band that has been mentioned in the sword killing of a 16-year-old Krugersdorp school pupil, one of the bad ones?

"I do not agree with the way in which Slipknot projects themselves... I cannot speak for a child that is mentally unstable. In the wrong hands, it [Slipknot's music] could be dangerous," Crabb replies.

One of Slipknot's songs states: "I wanna slit your throat and fuck the wound".

If one of his children arrived home with a Slipknot album, he would listen to it with them, said Crabb.

"There are some lyrics out there which are against the grain of what is healthy for a developing child.

Banning the music implies influence

"If they came home with a Slipknot album, I will sit down and listen to it with them and say: 'Shame, they [Slipknot] are clearly very angry. But you know, this doesn't fit into our family lifestyle'.

"But I would certainly not ban the music because then you are basically admitting that it will influence them," said Crabb.

Almost all the band members of Agro, which has released six albums - three of them internationally - have children, added Crabb.

"Our children are perfectly normal and incredibly loved and cared for. I've been able to share the beauty of our music with them, which teaches one to think honestly about social issues," he said.

Today's Wish

My wish for today is that life will stop shitting on those i love the most.

My wish for today is that the fuckwits that invade our lives will wake up and fuck off

My wish for today is that all my bestest lovelies will be blessed with friends like mine.

I know it's traditional that you only get three wishes, but i'm going for one more.

My wish for today is that nice people could, just every now and then, i'm not asking much, have nice things happen to them.

for the mums to be

Right now i seem to have a lot of friends with babies on the way. now i know when i was pregnant EVERYONE was full of (often completely useless) advice, so i'm going to hop on the band wagon with you guys. only difference is that you can choose to read this or not ;-)

• Just accept that your body is going to be distorted beyond recognition. Some days you'll love it, some days you'll hate it, but remember, whenever you can to milk the fact that you are 2 000 000 times bigger than you were a few months ago. It got me out of a particularly nasty insurance claim.
• Your boobs, ass and stomach are never going to be the same again. Think of it as a badge of honour. And buy padded bra's. They do wonders at upping a little sag.
  
• Don't freak out about what you read. If i had done that I would have starved to death, not touched anyone, gotten rid of my pets and not left the house for 9 months. Trust your body and just use a little common sense.
• You don't have to buy every accessory in the baby magazines. Our moms didn't have them and we turned out just fine. Shae slept without a remote-control-sleep-on-humidifying-breathing-monitor-security-blanket-sleep-positioning-lullaby-singing-angel-bear and she's still alive. And she doesn't look particularly deprived to me.
• Get used to mess. Accept the fact that within a year there will be butternut smeared into your couch and bits of biscuit between the seats.
• Wet wipes. You will love them.
• Birth is a scary thing. I can't lie, it hurts like nothing I can even begin to describe but don't listen to other people's horror stories about suctions, forceps and emergency ceasars. I don't know why it is that every woman who has had a child feels the need to tell pregnant women all their horror stories. Don't worry about offending them, just walk away or tell them to shut the fuck up.
• Don't be a hero. Take the fucking drugs.
• If your doctor makes you even the slightest bit uncomfortable, don't feel bad, find a new one.
• You will yell and throw things at your partner. Just remember to apologise. And don't leave him out of anything.

Love you all!

Screw Them

Years ago, in the old top 40 magazine, there was an advert which said something which really struck home for me. I know it was advertising jeans, but i can't remember which ones. I think it may have been levi's. anyway. i found the advert, which i'd ripped out and kept, this afternoon in one of the random boxes of stuff i keep promising myself i'll sort out one day. Here's what it said:

Screw Them
Screw everyone who told you it couldn't be done
Just because they never managed to.
Screw everyone who tried to make you feel weak
Because it was the only way they could feel strong.
Screw everyone who tried to make you act different, talk different,
BE different
Because they didn't understand
That if you weren't who you had to be
You were screwed.

This Week

So i'm sitting listening to leonard cohen looking back on this week, which has had its moments of stress and trauma, but on the whole been pretty damn good. the parking lot parties have resumed, the band is back home and the new cast members are amazing people.

Somehow, during this week, my faith in humanity has been almost re-established. and i have no idea how it happened. Maybe it's that in think i'm done with the latest pruning of people i thought were friends. the ones left are the most beautiful, caring, supportive people i could ever hope for. for the first time in my life i feel accepted for me, no pretenses, no act, no crap. this is me and i'm loved no matter how screwed up i am.

thanks guys :-)

I realise...

You are my achillies heel guy. All you have to do is snap your fingers and i'll come running and i hate that about myself almost as much as i adore you.